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The Vampire Diaries: The Struggle Part 4: I just can’t seem to get away from nurses lately

July 26, 2009

Greetings from offline (until time of posting).  I’ve put my mattress on my daughter’s bed because it’s lower to the ground and therefore easier to use while I recover from my appendectomy.  However, this means that my laptop is only connected to the internet when I slowwwwwly walk it back into my room, so this affords me with a lot of time to catch up on my schoolwork, sleep, and–hey!–recap.  What else am I going to do–there’s not even a TV in here.

When last we left Our Heroine, she was wrong wrong wrong but still managed, with a little help from her friends, to find her missing vampiric boyfriend, who was trapped in a well.  Wouldn’t it have been funnier if Tyler Smallwood had found him?  “Lassie, Stefan’s down the well!”  But we’re not supposed to know about that yet, even though it’s about as obvious as what’s in the box at the end of Se7en.  (OH COME ON, EVERYONE ELSE IN THE THEATER.  COME. ON.)

Remember, everyone, it’s okay to know that your friend is psychic, but it is NOT okay to let her know your boyfriend’s a vampire.  Bonnie is insisting on a doctor, but ~*Elena*~ shuts her down.  They take a very-waterlogged Stefan back to Matt’s car and to his boarding house, where the creeptastic Mrs. Flowers appears to walk in front of a window and…stare down at them.  That’s all she does, even when ~*Elena*~ calls to her to open the door.  It’s pretty freaky, actually.  I love the mystery of Mrs. Flowers.  Actually, I can’t remember if they ever resolve it.  I kind of think they don’t?  (Don’t tell me.)  Which is going to disappoint me all over again.  Anyway, Bonnie reailzes the door is open (Meredith couldn’t have done that? for balance?) and Mrs. Flowers disappears from the window and her light goes off.  Eeeerie.

Matt suggests anyone who lives in Fells Church who isn’t locking their doors lately is crazy (go Matt!  dear, sensible Matt!) and Bonnie’s like “She sure is.  I remember this one time–” but then they all stop in shock at Stefan’s totally trashed room.  Everyone wants to know what’s up, but ~*Elena*~’s reluctant to say much and wants to focus on getting Stefan warm.  You know, because vampires are all about warmth.  She and Matt are taking off Stefan’s wet clothes–NO COMMENT–while Meredith starts the fire, and ~*Elena*~ sees that Damon bit Stefan and goes to hide it.  She realizes what needs to be done but she figures she can’t do it in front of her friends, because “[t]he shock and horror of the discovery had nearly sent Elena herself reeling into madness.”  Uh…no it didn’t.  You were like “Le gasp!” and then “No wonder you’re so special!  That makes you perfect for me!” and then you guys were lovey-dovey until Damon came and blew your igloo down.  (It was made of special snowflakes.)  There’s also faulty logic here because she thinks, “If they know he’s a vampire, they’ll think he’s the bad guy.”  OR YOU COULD TELL THEM ABOUT THE OTHER, *BAD* VAMPIRE THAT’S BEEN HANGING ABOUT TOWN TOO.  Sigh.  She decides against it and tells everyone to go.  She sends Bonnie and Matt off to get Bonnie’s sister, the nurse (because nurses have so little medical skills that it will be “safe,” I suppose), and suggests Meredith goes as well.  Meredith is said to be meeting ~*Elena*~’s eyes, but I bet she’s also got an elegant eyebrow raised, cuz that’s her powerpower.  Meredith is smarter than Bonnie and Matt.  But she’s not questioning ~*Elena*~ anymore (sigh) so she goes as well.

~*Elena*~, alone with her wounded beloved, notes that he’s the color of marble.  Like Thomas Fell’s statue.  Well, no shock there that she’d love the whitest guy available.  She rechecks his neck and notes that the wound is far more violent than hers, more animal attack than loving exchange of blood blah blah blah.  She realizes she hates Damon.  Way to catch up.  There’s some stuff about vacated forms and empty vessels that I’m deliberately ignoring, and then she cuts her finger with broken window glass.

Really, ~*Elena*~?  Your finger?

Anyway, it’s just to get him to wake up enough to bite her neck.  Stefan tells her that he can’t take even more from her, since they’d already exchanged blood the night before, and she insists that if it’s not going to kill her, he should do it.  Of course, you know, if your FRIENDS had stayed around…but anyway, there’s a whole banquet simile I’m going to also ignore, and a comment about how Stefan is the only person who’s as stubborn as ~*Elena*~.  Really?  What about Damon?

It might be best for me to ignore all the similes and metaphor by saying “You know what?  They’re all cheesy.  Got it?  Good.”

Anyway, argue argue argue bite argue argue.

They have a minute of cute couple time, where he admires her not being fashionable (read: covered in mud) for once, and the others come back in, just in time.  Stefan’s quickly catches on to the fact that he’s supposed to have a phobia about doctors and tries to whammy Bonnie’s sister Mary from taking care of him.  Mary, being Scottish, is having none of that shit, and ~*Elena*~ has to drop the thermometer–could you BE any more obvious, woman?–to get back to the kind of avoidant normalcy in which she thrives.

Mary’s annoyed but since Stefan is obviously doing well, considering, she suggests a trip to the clinic after he’s rested, and points out how pale ~*Elena*~ is.  The group breaks up at that point–presumably so ~*Elena*~ can go rest after the long day everyone’s had–and Stefan takes ~*Elena*~ aside and admits his whammy didn’t work, you know, because he’s “still weak.”  He also says he doesn’t remember if it was Damon who attacked him (bwuh?) and makes her promise not to invite anyone into her house.  ~*Elena*~ promises, and the group heads out, with Bonnie reminding them all about the prophecy that ~*Elena*~’s supposed to die on the bridge, and ~*Elena*~ thinks that maybe it wasn’t about this night, but another.

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNN.

Well, that was short.

Have I made that Lassie joke before?  I feel like I may have, but I don’t know.  But this time I have an excuse: surgery!  I’m, uh, groggy, yeah, that’s it.

Next up: a longer chapter.

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