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The Vampire Diaries: Dark Reunion Part 3: Your substitute is dead. What does it mean?

September 25, 2010

Oh hello, Kahlua.  So nice of you to join me for this chapter.

I have an online date with one of my nearest and dearests soon, so let’s get this over with.  Um, I may have typed “this over this” first.  But it was just a LITTLE Kahlua!

When last we left Our Substitute Heroines, they were at a Caroline-mandated surprise party, for what turned out to be Meredith’s secret birthday.  A little funsies with a Ouija board ends badly–as it does–and the girls are in pitch-black creepiness.  Vickie, of course, flips the hell out.  She may be the weak one, but she knows exactly what the dark is capable of.

Bonnie is freaked, and Caroline is relatively calm.  Bonnie hilariously–and Meredithly–notes to herself that you’d have to have an imagination to imagine scary things, as Meredith gets things organized.  Hand in hand, they let Caroline lead them to the door, since it’s her house and all.

Bonnie notes that the darkness is, like, extra-dark.  No eye adjustment happens.  No moonlight shines in through the windows.  We’re at DEFCON 2, people.  DEFCON 2.

Then, as they get to the door, Caroline lets go of Bonnie’s hand, only to be replaced by another hand.  A hand that doesn’t belong to any of the girls.

DEFCON 1.

Something attempts to drag Bonnie away, but Meredith is there to grab her and pull back.  Bonnie and Meredith bolt and find themselves in a different room from everyone else.  When they realize that nothing is after them, they start getting logical.  Why isn’t Vickie screaming?  She’s so very good at giving away her location like that.

Meredith wants to throw Vickie to the darkness-wolves.  (Oh, ha.)  Bonnie feels that Vickie is her responsibility because she insisted she be there, and Meredith’s like “ARGH, she’s not even a main character.  But FINE!”  They get up from behind an armchair–didn’t pick up on that at first, very clever, except that they’re talking in the DARK, when that makes it easier to hear–and hear Sue yelling at Vickie.  Somehow, they’re upstairs.

Uh-oh.

Bonnie’s imagination goes into hyperactive and she probably WISHES she were Caroline at this point.  Still, they move slowly through the house, until some loud noises stopping them.  Some loud noises like Sue screaming at Vickie “No!” and some crashing.

This just can’t be good.

The lights come on, which is just as scary, because now you have to deal with the aftermath.  The aftermath is a busted-out set of French windows and a nearly-catatonic Vickie, who is all “I’m next.”  But where is Sue?

Sue has pulled a Shari Cooper.

*

The world has changed.  The adults are burying anything that happened in the past, and the girls are looking to see if their classmates can do any better than Sunnydale it all away.  I’m pretty much blowing through three pages in a few lines, but it’s a lot of “this is how they rationalize it” and we’ve been through that before. What’s important is that Alaric is out of the picture.  The vampires are out of the picture.  Sisters have to be doing it for themselves.

Well, not Caroline, though.  They’re staying in some place called Heron until it’s all over and their place is repaired.  Down one purposely clueless soldier.

Count out the rest of Fell’s High or whatever it’s called, too.  They just want to blame Vickie–who, as Meredith points out, barely has the mass to push a pillow, let alone a human body.  But still, no one wants to admit to anything, especially not a dead girl helping from beyond the grave.  Bonnie looks to Matt, the human doormat, for aid.

Matt’s a sort of no-go, in that he’s got the belief but no motivation.  He’s basically a shell of a human being since no one tells him what to do anymore.  Oh, don’t worry, Matt.  Bonnie will take care of that . She can be very pushy.

Tyler Smallwood shows up to ridicule everyone, in typical bully fashion.  He says e-mail–well, it actually has the dash, so I guess it could’ve been in the original book.  Does anyone have an older copy?  Let me know.  He also GIVES HIMSELF AWAY, but no one seems to notice that he knows exactly where Meredith and Bonnie were in the house when everything happened.

Sigh.  This chapter only gets dumber from here.

Tyler decides to blame Vickie and/or Stefan, and this bizarre meeting disrupts and disappears from there.  Bonnie and Matt get into a convo where he just bleeds depression all over the page.  Bonnie is his polar opposite, totally het up.  Meredith comes in as the voice of reason and Plot Progressor.  They finally get to the point about the spell–so they’re Not Alone (sighhh, hello, symbolism of pulling a guy into their midst before the spell, which I’d like to hope is Elena but I can’t even remember if it’s her or Stefan but hey, it’s just me seeing more than what’s there, right?) It takes them a whole page–on top of all this other time they’ve been talking about it, since Bonnie’s dream–to figure out the ingredients are hair and blood.  I don’t even wanna talk about it.  It’s all Right There but it’s still put up as a bit of a revelation, which is irritating.

Apparently, Bonnie has “Celtic magic books” to help them with the spell. But, as Matt rightly points out, who do they want to summon?

DUN DUN DUNNNNN.

Or:

DUH DUH DUHHHHHH.

End of chapter.

I guess Sue’s death is supposed to have SOME emotional impact, but I don’t know.  She was a secondary character, sort of an Elena-lite, and I’m pretty sure the book just keeps plowing on, diminishing her death.

Next: The book will remind me who it is who gets summoned.

Happy Banned Books Week, y’all!  I refuse to call it BBW, and instead will refer to it as BaBoWe (BAB-oh-wee).  Yes, I had that idea BEFORE the Kahlua.

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. September 25, 2010 9:00 pm

    It was originally e-mail in the books. The text in the reissues didn’t change except I think they have MORE typos. Go figure.

    I always fanwanked that Caroline left because she felt responsible for Sue’s death and was too proud to admit it.

  2. September 26, 2010 8:13 pm

    Snerkadoodle.

    Hey, are you getting my hits when I read your stuff from Bloglines? Not that it matters anymore, because Bloglines is going down in a few days, but I was wondering.

    • September 28, 2010 11:48 am

      Yes! I was trying to figure out who that was!

      • September 28, 2010 11:55 am

        Now they’re saying it’ll be up another month. I’ll miss it. I don’t wanna sign up for a Google account to use their reader.

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